Marriage & Relationship Talk

Even With The Perfect Wife, Why Do Men Still Cheat? By Jessica Torkwase Kuraun

This argument has been raging on for as long as many of us can remember. Men have reluctantly admitted that a lot of them are serial cheats. They agree that they are as guilty as charged. But many of them also insist though that their wives, strangely, are the reasons why they just can’t stop chasing after every lovely looking daughter of Eve on two beautiful legs. And they have come up with some of the most rational to the most outrageous  reasons why they cheat on poor old wife. One of the most common excuses is that ‘she doesn’t make herself look beautiful for me anymore’. Another common excuse is, “my wife is no longer as romantic as she used to”.One other very common reason why men cheat on their wife is, “my wife’s appetite for sex has waned and she complains when I want it.” Some also claim, “she has no time for me, all her attention has shifted to the kids.” The reasons are endless, their grievances are without a doubt compelling. I agree absolutely. But how about instances where the woman has played the perfect wife? She looks good for her husband, makes herself available whenever he wants her and gives him great sex. She is still as romantic as she was when they were courting and the last thing she’ll do is to neglect him for the kids. Yet, Oga is still climbing in between the sheets with females of different shapes and sizes. He knows the newest and cheapest hotels in town and sometimes even gets discounts just for being a reliable and consistent customer. What is the logical explanation for this?
I know a lot of women won’t like this, but findings have shown that most men who cheat do so simply because its become an incurable habit they lack the capacity to stop. But atleast, the good news is, its not necessarily because you’re no longer setting the bedroom on fire like you used to that’s sending him running into the arms of his mistress, or because you’re no longer as slim and beautiful as you used to be, no, not that.
A man who’s inclined to cheating on his wife would most likely still do so even if his wife transforms into a Miss World over night. Lets understand it, the biggest challenge men have is the fact that most men are very easily moved by what they see on a woman, starting with her face. At this point, when a man is confronted with the temptation of taking an irresistibly attractive woman to bed, it now comes down to, how much discipline and self control he has, how much he loves his wife and how much he respects his marriage. Sadly, not too many men can overcome this temptation. The lure of the sweet smelling body of a willing female (sometimes it matters little whether she’s pretty or not) is simply too much for most men to pass up. But trust me, there are still a few good men out there. Men who cherish their marriage and adore their wives. Which is why its extremely important for a woman to marry a man she’s sure loves her like she loves him. Hopefully, its this love that’ll keep him guided and prick his conscience when he’s about to go astray. The fact that he won’t like to see you hurt if you find out he’s been cheating on you keeps some men grounded. They’re not really scared of the noise and trouble you’ll give them, its the sadness and pain the situation will cause you that they dread the most. And that can only be because he loves you. So, my advice to women, even if you suspect your man is cheating on you, don’t let that change you. Keep being the perfect wife, don’t stop looking beautiful for him. Don’t complain or reject him when he wants your body in his arms and don’t nag him, otherwise you’ll only end up sending him back into the waiting arms of his mistress. Just love him. Let him know your fears, let him know you’re saddened by the fact that you suspect he’s sharing you with another woman, but DON’T nag or fight him, you will only successfully send him back into the waiting embrace of his new beau. Love your husband, take care of him the way a good wife should, and you might just get his conscience to start pricking him when next he’s about to embark on one of his illicit ‘sex escapades’.

Jessica Torkwase Kuraun also known as Jessica TeekaySpeaks Brown is a Marriage and Relationship Motivational Writer, Blogger, Counselor, Mother and Wife. She is a match-maker and has a passion in providing listening ear to married couples, giving advice, and counseling them in an attempt to help with offering a solution to whatever challenges they face. She is very passionate about building healthy marriages and relationships.

Visit her Blog and website: and the No 1 dating site in Africa

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